Often times, the father's side of the new parenthood life is overlooked. Let's face it, they don't go through nearly half the things we go through as WOMEN and MOTHERS. However, I do have to be fair and give them credit where it's do. It's not easy being a father either especially the first time around. The changes a MAN goes through when becoming a father may not be the same as a WOMAN but, they also have to adapt to a new lifestyle.
I decided I would interview my husband on his perspective on his new life as a father. I asked him to be as honest as possible when answering each question. Hopefully, this will give other soon to be dads a little insight on what to expect and give moms out there some understanding on the dad's side of things.
Q: What was your immediate thought after finding out you were going to have a baby? A: “My immediate thought was, Damn.... our lives are going to change forever. You were so focused on your career in fashion and I knew that having a child at this moment would postpone your career goals. I felt like I was to blame for it. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to be a father.” Q: Do you feel it would’ve been different for you raising a son as opposed to a daughter? If so, in what way? A: “No, i truly believe in this day in age it’s equal regardless of the sex of your child. You still need to teach them the same things. You still worry about the same things.” Q: Then, why were you desiring a boy so badly before we found out the sex? A:“Well because i knew we could do things such as dressing alike, teach him how to work on cars, etc. But, then after I found out I was having a girl, i realized I can do the same things with her.” Q: Whats been the biggest change in your lifestyle after having a baby? A: “Knowing that I can’t just wake up and do whatever I want. I have to first think about Celine and my wife before I decide to do anything. Everything I do revolves around my girls. I have to make sure their wants and needs are taken care of before I make any plans for myself.” Q: What is one thing you’ve given up after having a baby? A:“Not working as much as before. I want to be able to be home to spend time with my daughter and watch her grow. You cannot put a price on those small moments with your child.” Q: What challenges have you faced as a first time dad? A: “The biggest challenge for me has been time management. Juggling making time for my daughter, for my wife, and for myself. What would usually take us 30min to get ready and leave the house now is an additional 2 hours with a baby.” Q: How would you say having a baby has affected or changed your relationship with your wife? A: “It’s a difficult change because we no longer come first for each other, now it’s our daughter. She comes first before anything. But its also made our bond so much stronger after seeing my wife give birth and how great of a mother she is to our baby. I cherish her selflessness and her commitment to continue her career goals while juggling and being a super mom to celine.”
Q: What was your biggest fear when it came to becoming a father? A: “My biggest fear about becoming a father was if I will be a great, loving, and supportive father that doesn’t let work or business get in the way.”
Q: What is one thing you don’t feel comfortable doing when it comes to taking care of your baby that you always leave mommy to do? A: “Poopy diapers!...I can do wet diapers but I hate poopy diapers.” Q: If you can give a soon to be first time dad advice, what would it be? A: “One, make sure your finances are in order before the baby comes. Make sure you have a safety net before the baby is born because you’re going to want to spend time with your partner and the baby. Second, have patience. The sleepless nights are tough but, things get better with time. Lastly, enjoy being a dad.”
